Where, oh where, is Barbara Billingsley when we need her?
(Somewhere in the mists of heaven or the fumes of hell, Doctor Johnson, with or without his towel, is suffering through a pain so intense you'd think Alderaan had been blown to smithereens all over again.)
And in related Hoochie-news.... I guess all the tumescent teen-stalkers will simply have to wait for her to fall out of her clothes "by accident" again. Gawd that girl's just dyyyyyying to get out of her fabrics, isn't she? Not that I'm necessarily complaining, but one does start to wonder how guilty one should feel everytime one turns on the television set anymore.
So, all together now: ~~ It's a Nabokov world when the whistle blows, / No one owns a piece of my time / And there's a Nabokov me inside my clothes / Thinkin' that the world looks fine, yeah.... ~~
No? How about this one? ~~ Wastin' away again in Lolitaville, searching for my lost.... ~~
**Er, ahem** Don't worry-- I'll feel appropriately ashamed of myself sooner or later. Probably later. Definitely later.
- ► 2007 (209)
- ► 2006 (178)
- ► 2005 (380)
- Happy New Year, Everyone
- ~~ Oh, Oh, Domino.... ~~
- Puss In Box
- A Spectacular Lack Of Creativity...
- Susan Sontag Dead At 71
- "Honestly, It's Just So High Up There..."
- The Obligatory Post-Christmas Entry
- Absence Makes The Heart Grow Something-Or-Other
- Meeting The Breadth Requirement
- "It Trips Dishonestly Off The Tongue"
- So What Do You Want For Christmas?
- The Best Laid Schemes O' Mice An' Men
- "What Do Women Want?"
- We Know, We Saw The Video....
- A Titter From A Bitter Critter
- Lowered Exultations
- The Madness of King George
- A Surprise In Every Box
- The Lost Weekend
- Taking It All In
- A Portrait Of The Doctor As An Old Man?
- Big Brother And Its Champion
- Yup, He Really Said It
- The Wisdom Of Solomon
- Today's Public Service Link
- Let's See The Flop....
- Dulce Et Decorum Est
- From The "What To Do With Useless Former Prime Min...
- And The "Disturbing Father Of The Year" Award Goes...
- The Fuller Brush Girl
- Cbeckois Agitations
- Most Isn't Good Enough, We Have To Have It All! W...
- Snap, Crack Ho, Pop
- Not So Smart-- And Proud Of It
- When Lilacs Last In The Dead Land Bloom'd
- Careless Blisters
- More Exercises In Bad Writing
- Exodus 7:19-20, Hoser-Style, or Cotton Mathe...
- Coming To A Box Near You
- "A Little Pleasure Dome If I've Ever Seen One"
- All That Bijjibajjazza
- Terror, In A Handful Of Words
- Masters of Allusion
- Filthy, Filthy Lucre
- My Tongue Gets Around
- Hamburger Hill
- Lapses of Zanity
- ~~ But I Don't Want To....
- ~~ Simply The Best ~~ (Better Than All The Res...
- Once More Unto The Streets
- ~~ De Dude Dude Dude, He's Daft Daft Daft ~~ ...
- The Unbearable Lightness Of Buehring, or A L...
- ~~ I Believe In Myrrhacles ~~ (You Sexy Thang, Y...
- Getting The Wrinkles Out
- Yo Adrian!
- Because, Believe It Or Not, People Keep Asking
- From Blind Air, From Complete Eclipse
- Run For Cover, Lads!
- The Limburger Babies
- "Our Strength, Hope and Joy"
- The Second Coming
- And So It Begins....
- Absurd Headline Of The Day
- The Holy Grail (Of Canned Meats)
- A Transport Of Cordiality
- Like A Complete Unknown
- The Searchers
- ~~ Get A Little Bit.... ~~ (Don't Be Shy)
- It's A Hard Knock Life...
- A Cautionary Tale On Giving Up
- Once A Day And Twice On Sundays
- You've Got To Be Kidding Me....
- Hooker In The Mornin'
- Take Me Out To The Ball Game
- German Sausage
- One Shrimp,Two Shrimp
- Tender Mercies
- Canada's Chronicler
- ▼ December (80)