Transylvanian Hooter Girls

      In case you're a monumental idiot and you couldn't already surmise this from the previews, this review hilariously confirms the obvious: that Van Helsing sucks canal water. (Early press on the film is roundly dismissing it; I've yet to read a word in praise of it.) Who, I asks ya, who thought this idea would work? Probably the same morons that thought The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen would be both fun and educational....