Suffering From Textual Dysfunction?

      Someone you secretly admire? Want to send them something special on Valentine's Day? Does this person have a text-messaging service that you have somehow, covertly or maliciously, managed to pinpoint? Well, then, does this blog have the answer for you!

      Because nothing, and I mean nothing, says "I love you" like a Scottish poet's ditty on your text-messaging service...

            I love ye, lass, more than haggis,
            Sincerely hope t'night ye'll bag us.

      (Oh, lord, those poems are truly awful...)