From Ananova comes this story which, for reasons that should be obvious, is worth quoting here in its entirety:
Cane or breast for naughty pupils [Original story can be found here]
A schoolteacher has been suspended in Zimbabwe for allegedly giving pupils the choice of being caned or suckling her breasts.
[Gee, I wonder what they chose....]
The woman faces a disciplinary hearing after one of the pupils reported the 'punishment' to his parents, reports the Herald.
[Even the newspaper won't call it 'punishment'!]
The boy claimed he was asked to choose between suckling the teacher's breasts or receiving 100 strokes of the cane for being noisy.
The boy chose to suckle the teacher's breasts, as did 14 others, according to the newspaper.
[Duh. Note also the key words, so casually subordinated, "as did 14 others." Fourteen? I'm not sure whether to be shocked or merely impressed.]
The headmaster of the Harare school summoned the teacher to respond to the allegations.
[Bastard...]
The teacher allegedly admitted forcing the children to suckle her breasts but could not give reasons why she had done so.
[Does there have to be a reason?]
Harare provincial education director Tomax Doba confirmed the incident and said that his office had been furnished with a report from the school.
"We received a report from the school and the report says it happened. We have already advised them to make a police report and the teacher is likely to face child abuse charges," Mr Doba said.
[I'm still trying to figure out the 'abuse' part here...]
Okay, I'm getting a few ideas right now that I most certainly should NOT be getting....
All together now:
~~Teacher, teacher / Can you teach me....~~
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